Socially acceptable schizophrenia

Dear body-

We've always had a rather adversarial relationship, you and I. You've hurt me again and again. I've been terribly rough on you. We dont communicate well. Youre rather oblique with your requests, and since I have a hard time understanding them, I generally just give you what I think you may want; something sweet to sweeten you up.

You inevitably pout, because I haven't read your wishes. Your pouting makes me tired and weak. It makes me not want to do anything for you. Why should I, if you can't do me the simple favor of perking up after and lovely sweet snack? Because I don't wish to do anything nice for you, you get tired too, and the cycle continues. A cycle of negative co-dependence, really. We're both awfully passive-aggressive. Which makes this a relationship my therapist would tell me to get out of.

So, can we come to a compromise? We are stuck in this particular relationship. We haven't much choice.

And to be honest, I really wouldn't want it any other way. You are obstinate and damaged and carrying more than a small excess of baggage. But you are also beautiful. You are delicate and sublime and heavy-duty. People should draw charcoal sketches of you just to understand your curves. They should paint you to come to realizations abut your skin. They should sculpt you to test your gravity and feel your strength.

I offer this compromise-

I will listen if you will speak up.

I will respond to your strengths if you will respond to mine.

I will come to understand if you will give me answers.

Yours
Liz